Once upon a time, in the meadow below the Castle of Cashel, where the Irish colleens gambolled with the little people, a worried Brian Boroo, the King of the Castle, walked with his shillelagh under his arm and a problem on his mind.

      The Irish Troubles:

      Sometimes he would take aim at a toadstool with his stick and with a twinkle in his eye, send the mushroom over a bough of a tree. The problem that caused him such concern was the trouble he had in keeping his Irish Volunteers engaged about the Castle rather than raiding the neighbours cattle and women. They needed something to do between defending their community against the raping and plundering Vikings - and now the Anglos and Saxons.

      The Leprechaun and His Pot of Gold:

     This particular day a little leprechaun, playing drop the hanky with the colleens, saw his toadstool home disappear over a bough of the tree in a puff of dust. He took the chance that this handsome King would not catch and ransom him for his crock of gold and so offered the solution to the problem.

     War Games:

    Could the King, he suggested, make up a game of War to keep his soldiers occupied. A stick and ball game which would not only keep them sharp and accurate but would also make them think about tactics - how to move from one place to another for the best advantage - how to ambush and keep their foe left footed.

    The King's Shilling:

     King Brian saw this as an ingenious solution and quickly made up the rules of combat, laid out a battleground and had his men use their shillelaghs for bats or mallets. The targets were made of bent sticks stuck in the ground and the balls were carved from wood. He called the game "shilling" after the shillelagh (stick) that was used as a club or mallet.

     The Clan O'Brian:

    Thus his troops had practice at war games which kept them both alert and occupied without being hurt. They won many battles against the Vikings and the Anglo-Saxons. To this day no true O'Brian will tread on or damage a mushroom - a possible home of the little people.

    However,  Irishmen have been duped into the service of the British Empire mistaken by the offer of the "King's Shilling"

    The Frogs:

    One day a Frenchman was shipwrecked on the Irish Coast and saw the game being played. When he eventually returned to France he explained the game to his countrymen. The word "shilling" had connotations of a sinister nature for them. When he indicated that it was a stick similar to that used by shepherds - an English "crook" - they pronounced it "Croquet" for small crook. And so the name of the game was changed and became a favourite with  war loving Europeans.

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      About this time King Brian was trying to rid Ireland of the wailing pipes of the banshees. A wild man from across the sea - a William Wallace - feel in love with the noise of the skinned cat and by offering him the wailing pipe, the recipe of a local distilled beverage - poteen -  and his shilling or "Croquet" game, Brian was able to introduce these civilities into Scotland.

      Golf Croquet

      The bagpipes are now the mating call of Scotsman, whisky their main drink, and Croquet they changed to Golf - for a hole in the ground was cheaper than a hoop and less likely to trip an unsteady imbiber.

     The "Queen of the Colonies"

      King Brian had many sons - the O'Brian Clan - and they have taken their game around the world. The first game was played by the O'Brians in Australia at Fig Tree Pocket (Brisbane). They had arrived as free settlers on the "Queen of the Colonies" in 1863. The game was played on the deck of the ship coming by way of the Cape using flat  wooden pucks instead of balls.

      The "POSH" People:

      The Captain of the "Queen" thought it a great game and later introduced it to his Company's ships on passage to India. The new P & O Line. It was on these ships that the war game of Croquet got it's "posh" or affluent rating. The game was always played in the shade by the "pucka" Ladies and Gentlemen of the Raj and Empire - thus it was Port-side Out and Starboard side Home or POSH. And the name of the "ball" was the "puck" hence "Pucka Sahib".

      Wimbledon Croquet and Tennis Club:

     The Club now famous for it's tennis "Wimbledon" was originally the Wimbledon Croquet Club. Tennis eventually made Croquet redundant for a period for tennis allowed tradesmen to see the naked ankle of a Lady - voyeurism - and not the done thing for them back then. It has been indicated that as many ladies now wear little or nothing on the courts, Croquet will return to leave something to the imagination - to stir the blood of the tradesmen.

  Into our Vocabulary:

      To "Peg out" is an Irish expression to die. "Cock o' the Hoop" is also derived from Croquet. Show a man through the hoops. Bounders were cads who sent your balls to the boundary.

      War Ships:

      Most Passenger/Cargo ships had deck Croquet with Tournaments between passengers and crew. The writer first played this version of Croquet on the Flight Deck of the Aircraft Carrier HMAS "Sydney" on the way to the Queen's Coronation in 1953 and during the Korean War. Ice hockey pucks were used in place of balls - with rings painted on the deck instead of hoops.

       Kung-Fu  Croquet:

       Later, on SS "George Anson" (Dominion Far East Line) in S/East Asia, deck Croquet was a passion for both passengers and crew. It was introduced into Japan during filming of Kung-Fu Movies. The Japanese have named a locally manufactured motorcar the "Croquet".

                        Bernard J Gleeson   

        (a descendant of King Brian Boroo of Ireland)